Haiku Beer Review: Hommelbier

Hommelbier

Thought it great at first,
Now – a dry, boring Orval
Only one will do.

I’ve been back to this drop once or twice in the past few months, though despite always being a little disappointed by the blandness, there’s something that gets me buying it again and again. At 7.5% alcohol volume, it’s not exactly a beer that can be sneezed at, however it doesn’t sooth a thirsty throat like a non eleven percent-er should.

Interesting (?) to note is that you can read about Hommelbier on wikipedia in both eastern Flemish, and Western. Flanders. What a place, eh?

Junior Eurovision – Not so European afterall

I’m having a particularly “European moment” this evening, counting down the former-Russian-state entrants for this years Junior Eurovision, anxiously waiting for the appearance of the Belgian entrant.

Somehow in the past week there has been enough publicity behind the Belgian entrant that my girlfriend even knows the words to the song.

What makes this evening all the more interesting is that of the 13 entrants, only 6 are actually in the European Union. And of those six, both Netherlands *and* Belgium are eager entrants, televising the event at primetime on channel 1 (een).

The children in the studio-audience have been dancing in synchronization with the movements of my stomach. What an evening.

Pieter Embrechts and his lovely pants stain

This evening whilst watching a bottle of wine empty before me, I couldn’t help but notice the above semen stain live on television.
Thanks Pieter Embrechts, you made my evening!

Domino Day 2009

When I was a child I remember seeing short ten second clips of ‘domino record attempts’ at the end of television news broadcasts, in the light-hearted segment reserved for post-sports news filler.  However here in Belgium, this ten-second clip is reserved for an entire day.

This Friday was ‘The Domino Day’, where teams from Belgium and Netherlands try to out-do each other with plastic blocks and their wacky ways of knocking them over.

Apparently this spectacle has been held annually since 1974, with every year tonne of falling plastic added to the record books. To save you a trip to wikipedia, I graphed the number of dominoes fallen per year. Now you know that  by 2012 there will be one fallen domino for every person on the planet.

End of times prophesy? WHO CAN SAY!

WHO CAN SAY!

2 Unlimited R Just 2 Far Away 2Nite

This morning Last.Fm sent me a gig recommendation to go to the other side of Belgium to visit Marbehan, as everyone’s favourite band with absolutely zero limits, 2 Unlimited are for some reason (presumably unlimited) playing.

Unfortunately the drive takes me into the French part of Belgium, of which I am still terrified of.

deux illimité? No.

How Much Is that (Painfully expensive swiss watch) in the window?

Things You May Not Have Known About The Geneva Airport Unless Your Flight Was Delayed By A Strike In Brussels #1078:

Before any intercom anncouncement, the first five notes of ” How much is that doggy in the window?”  are played.

It seems I am not the first person to notice this.

Yes, my plane has been delayed long enough to justify this post. My humble appologies, Internet.

Kaka doen!

Kakadu, not Kaka doen

I handed my dear Flemmish girlfriend a brochure on all things Australia, in an  attempt to try and sell the idea of a holiday this Christmas.  She was impressed by the idea of a “Yarrah Valley’ with its 50 wineries and many tasty restaurants, though she couldn’t help but laugh at the idea of a “Kakadu”, which roughly translates into “Do a poo” in Dutch.

Funny times.

Annelies, Kaka-doen?

Belgian Beer Review: Pater

In Belgian terms, Vosselaer is on the other side of the world to Gent, being exactly 101 km from the steps of my appartment. So it comes as no surprise that the beer of Vosselaar has never in the past made it to my refrigerator. Why drive 101 km when your local options are just so damn good?

Fortunately via the miracle of modern-logistics, the local beer-shop delivered me two of Vosselaer’s finest beers from the brewery ‘De Lelie‘, Dutch for ‘The Lily’, however tonight I only want to waste your time on one – the damnnnnn fine dark brew ‘Pater‘ (Dutch for Father)

This daddy of beers is amazingly dark (at least in the light I am writing in – which is to say ‘candle lit’), or amber if you believe the packaging. The taste is subtle, a little caramelly, a light hoppy after-taste, and an over-all glow-enducing sweetness that is neither sweet enough to rot teeth or encourage any silly post-pouring sugar lumps.

Pater has an alcohol content of 6%, quite a low value for the beers it shares fridge-space with, however this makes the perfect after-heavy beer when a simple pintje (lager) just won’t do.

Apparently I was supposed to let this beer settle for a few months to encourage further maturation in the bottle, however it’s Saturday night and who has time for that sort of nonsense. Not me, that’s who.

A few nights ago I started off with the De Lelie’s primary beer, “Paus‘ (Dutch for ‘Pope’), however this was not an entirely memorable experience. The beer was a little too malty for my liking, and didn’t really register on my palate. At least not enough for a review, to say the least. I remember drinking the entire glass, I suppose. So it can’t have been that bad.

Pater = 8/10.
Paus = Drunken, but nowhere near as good as Pater. I’ll give it a token 6.5 -> 7/10.

Vevey, zwembads and red eyes

EN? NL! After three hallways, two elevators and one very confused receptionist, I found the hotel swimming pool. By the time I had reached my destination, I had already fallen out of favour of the morning swim,  so I only managed to convince myself of a few lazy laps before coming back to my room. Despite my laziness, I still managed to come back with beautiful rosey stoned eyes. Damn you, chlorine! Back to work. Switzerland. Na drie gangen, twee liften en een zeer verward receptioniste, Ik vond het hotel zwembad. Toen vond ik het zwembad heb ik niet willen zwemmen, dus ik alleen zwommen tien ronden voor dat ik terug naar mijn kamer. Ondanks mijn lui, ik heb nog steeds rode ogen. Godverdomme, cholrine! Terug aan het werken. Zwitserland.

Beards and bands and sold out venues

The other day whilst drinking my daily dose of beers at the Beirhuis, a tour poster above the urinal caught my attention. I had never heard of any of the advertised bands, but dang yo that was one good looking band (Great Lake Swimmers). Nice photography, I thought. Nice beards. Beards say a lot about bands as of late, I thought. Nice. I am going to go home, sober up over a period of days, and damn well listen to these bands and very much consider going to one of these shows.. That was what I thought, before drowning another Trappist.

Having sobered up this morning (exactly three days on), I ventured over to the venue website and found that it had already sold out. After seconds of disapointment, I opened up Spotify and found that with beardness comes a certain degree of musical blandness. Whilst I appreciate Bon Iver, Fleet Foxes and all the other well-groomed bands that popped out in 2008, sometimes I can’t help but think that there is a line to draw in the sand. A line I am quite content calling “December 31st 2008″.

Anyway, if you’re in Gent, still in a pro-beardy mood, and already have a ticket for the gig, I suggest you click play below and have a listen to Great Lake Swimmers before I totally move on and listen to some more Peaches, or, something.